my vagina and reproductive organs can go fuck themselves.

i am in so much pain. ow.

... we fought and fought and fought all day saturday.

about the stupidest things.

then we went back to our respective homes and made up over the phone. wow, one of those days when we just kept missing each other and taking things the wrong way. shit happens.

today was much better. had a productive morning/early afternoon, then just hung out.

dinner friday was amazing! had so much fun :D i miss having all of us together. so hard for it to happen these days.

going a bit nutty over here. can't sleep. my brain too mush to actually work on assignment due in 18 hours. *continues to look at bachelor apartments in toronto despite not having any money. looks up synonyms for "pathetic" on m-w.com*

is there such thing as grace or dignity in love or heartbreak?

... random thought.

it's a busy week and my oh so female body is not cooperating. my muscles are aching (NOT from exercising) and my energy level is low. it's been extremely difficult to fight off the fatigue. and i'm past the horny ovulating stage so it's not fun anymore. oh pms, i shake my fist at thee.

i'm doing a bit of my readings, heading over to have brunch with ingrid, dawn, and silva, then running to work for a few hours, then back to tutor, then i have to get started on the damn assignment that is due tomorrow (finally).

i am seriously thinking about chopping off my hair. i am sick of the dry ends that has been dyed over too many times. i was going to go a lot lighter for the summer, but i'm re considering since it will be very high maintenance.

this is the funniest orgasm face i've ever seen.

... hahhahahahahaha.

it's funny how easily us mortals forget.

... could summer be really here?

just taking a quick break from reading before i head over to tutor.

spent the weekend walking around, watching tlc (2 hours of Extreme Couponing marathon and he thought it was fun - i watched and he did naughty things to me), and just enjoying the sun. went to lusso for the first time this summer, and i promise you that there will be plenty more visits to that place.

looking forward to brunch and bubble tea with the girls this week. can't wait. i miss them so.

... started class today. walking in the rain was a pain in zee arse.

when will the sunshine come back?

as i get older, i am noticing that i have absolutely no tolerance or patience for immature stupid bitches. *sigh* why, oh why, are there so many of them in the world?

it's a long weekend that's coming up. dawn's visiting for a week and so is ingie for two days. it should be a fun week.

potluck at jason's this week, that should be fun.

i rolled around in bed with the lover for 3 hours. lol. nothing but hugs, kisses and tummy rubs. i know i write about the lover a lot here, but this helps me not to gush over him too much to people in real life. i'm not really a mushy person, or least i thought, until i met him. what can i say? i'm in love, damn it.

i'll be as puzzling as sun showers. it's sunny, but it's raining. whaaaaaaat?

... i have returned home with apple scented tea light candles, an ice "heart" tray (yes, from ikea. a laboured - the lover had to carry all the stuff that he didn't anticipate buying - but a fun trip, with lots of coffee refills! the lover: "oh my god, you should see your face when you said coffee *does a mad rapist grin*), a mini whiteboard (the lover recently bought a new one as an upgrade from the chalkboard he had. today, he bought a glass panel board, which is infinitely cooler than a whiteboard, but yay free whiteboard for me!), a psychedelic scarf that i will use as a belt, a silk peach shirt, a floor grazing see through gypsy jacket, and a black sweater with white trim/button detail, all from the clothing sale with adrie - she's my thrifting buddy.

oh and i bought a cupcake tray that will enable me to make 18 cupcakes at a time. and i got a pastry bag with different nuzzles a few days ago.

save only me.

... May is going to be an interesting month.

I'm almost half way through it, wading through the dullness, but May is going to be an interesting month. i know it.

finally I'll be going to the clothing sale this saturday after months of wanting to, eat yummy and cheap ikea food, and etc. starting school next week again, which is exciting.

i'm going to introduce my brother and the lover to eachother this month. i'm going to meet his mother and going to his work bbq. yeah, we're like that. oh my lord, when did all this happen? lol. all the meshing of lives and the commitment.

he has magical powers.

but then again, i've been bringing him to most of sec's gatherings as soon as we started dating, so *shrug*.

To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly b broken. If u want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give ur heart to no one... avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket-safe, dark, motionless, airless- it will change. It will not be broken; but it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.. C.S Lewis


"So forcible within my heart I feel the bond of nature draw me to my own, my own in thee, for what thou art is mine; Our state cannot be severed, we are one, One flesh; to lose thee were to lose myself" Adam to Eve, Paradise Lost, John Milton.

je l'aime.

... i really want crocheted shorts. i tried these ones at h and m but didn't really fit quite right. i've been on the hunt for the right ones, but it's really hard. it's also really hard to find sweater shorts. *sigh* why do i always end up liking stuff that takes forever to find? it was thigh high boots 4 years ago and it was two finger rings 3 years ago, before they became so readily available in stores.

anywho, i did end up taking the first train to the lover's house. we ate, napped, enjoyed the sunshine, shopped, blew bubbles in the park, played on the swings, went grocery shopping, had lots of ice cream, watched movies, and we coloured/bumped pretties/engaged in coitus all weekend.

happy mommy day.

... i hope that you can find your happiness, mom.

5:10 and I can't sleep. Should I lie here some more or should i hop on the first train to head over to the puppy's house and snuggle with him?

my pores opened up and gulped down, now they're drunk off of sunshine.

... "I've learned that love is like a brick. you can build a house or sink a dead body
i'll bring him down, bring him down, down
Judas is the evil i cling to"

i had forgotten, that all things based on emotions are like an unstable bridge.

... you just don't know when it's going to break, until you cross it.

i don't need to run away, because i know you will follow.

... it leaves me dumbfounded how fucking awesome we are together.

we get a day of sunshine to get us through the next five dreary ones.

... am i to enjoy the spring rain that nourishes all?

yesterday was absolutely beautiful, a little taste of the warmth that is to come.

kerfuffle. what a pleasant sounding word with such contrary meaning.

anyways, we had a date day, shopping, going to the theatre, a 4.5 hour dinner while watching the ufc game at the bar. then a sleepover.

now it's may.